Hello. I just want to relate my experience with a confinement lady who lives in Yishun. She has a English name with starting with a "I". She claims that she has experience in handling twins and triplets and this is all she will do. She hardly do singletons she said. I have no doubts at all abt her abilities but it is her actions and words used that made me really upset.
Continue reading and u tell me if i shd be upset.
I have delivered a set of twins in June. They were of gestational age 34 weeks upon delivery and the reason why i had to deliver them at 34 weeks instead of the usual 35/36 weeks is bcos one of the twin was not putting on weight ( Dr have been monitering his weight for a month and it was stagnant at 1 over kg, and it was amazingly that i could hold it to 34 weeks pregnancy!)
Twin 1(older twin) was the lighter babe. He weighed 1.6kg. The other twin was 1.9 kg.
As he was light weight, he was in the NICU for 3 weeks. The other twin was at the NICU for 2 weeks. They were basically alright. Just light weight.
I have paid a deposit of 1k to her prior to delivery. She said that this is standard practice for her as she is very popular and needs us to confirm we want her. We paid the 1k. She photocopied her IC to us and said that she wont run away with the money. Her services for twins are at 2.8K. No housework at all. Just cook and take care of me and babes. She said that she is unlike other confinement ladies who do simple h/w. She added that she is a professional. We acceped that. Hmm....we wondered.....
We found it hard to find confinement ladies who wanted to do twins. We had a few who rejected us too, so we were happy to get one experienced with twins!!!
The confinement lady called me many times before and after i delivered to "follow up". When she knew i have delivered, she said that she wanted to start immediately. I said that the twins r in hospital and will be there between 2 weeks to a month! She said that she cant wait for so long and she needed to start within 10 days of my delivery so that she can accept other job offers. I asked her politely who she will take care of when the babes are not back. She said that she will take care of me. Yes, that is important but i need her help more once the twins are back.
I plead with her to wait. She called nearly everyday to find out when she can start. I was so stressed as i was recovering frm my c sec and had to go to the hospital daily to see the babes and give them the expressed milk and yet the confinement lady had to add on to my stress. At one point i chose not to answer her phone when i saw her number on my hp.
On the day 10 of my delivery, the confinement lady called again and demanded that she needs to start now. Regardless if babes are back. She added that i have the right to tell the dr that i want the babes to be discharged and to tell the dr that the confinement lady can do a better job of plumpming them up!!! I told her i cant do that and its really the Dr's decision to discharge them and not hers!!!
She added that the hospital charges must be low that is why i choose to continue to put then there. I was like ????...Anyone noes that NICU is hefty!!!
She said that in this case, she cant work for me then. I asked her what happens to my 1k deposit and she said too bad, this 1k is to prevent us from rejecting their services at the last min. I tol her i didnt reject her, but the babes need another 2 weeks in the hospital.
She said that among her 20 yrs of doing confinement, she has never had babies who had to stay there for so long. I said that they are twins and there is always a chance of an even much much earlier delivery in multiples! I even said that she can start when my heavier twin gets back in a few days and asked for a lower charge as now its singleton she is caring for. She said that she will charge a hundred dollars lesser than the 2.8k initially agreed on. I said 2.7K for 1 baby ???
To cut the story short, my 1k was gone, no confinement lady at this most crutial time and this made me depressed. In the end, i ate no confinement food, no "special herbal water" to bath.
I am stronger now and i have "pu" myself up with other forms of nourishments after my twins were discharged and thus i can relate my experience to parents of multiples.
I have regained my sanity of caring for my twins in the hospital, and i have rested at home too. I thus called her a week ago, and asked if i can get half of my 1k back. Guess what did she say???
She said that luckily i called her as she has lost my number. She wanted to call me to tell me to pay a "fine" of $200 for not engaging her services last min resulting in loss of job offers.
I gasped and slammed the phone of cos...
